The girl they said not to marry

[ariastar]

What the hell is up with that girl? She's wanting her fiancé to change a core part of who he is. It's like she likes the packaging and some of the extra content, but not the main product. Doesn't work that way. How could a relationship last even long enough to get to an engagement if she's so unhappy with a major part of who he is?

I thought at first Kevin and Alex would cop out, so was glad they said not to marry her. That couple needs to seriously rethink what they're wanting from a relationship and how much each is willing to accept isn't perfect (in each's own eyes) about the other. If it's such an issue that he change who he is, then how can that relationship last for years down the road?

[masherscf]

What the hell is up with that girl? She's wanting her fiancé to change a core part of who he is. It's like she likes the packaging and some of the extra content, but not the main product. Doesn't work that way. How could a relationship last even long enough to get to an engagement if she's so unhappy with a major part of who he is?

I thought at first Kevin and Alex would cop out, so was glad they said not to marry her. That couple needs to seriously rethink what they're wanting from a relationship and how much each is willing to accept isn't perfect (in each's own eyes) about the other. If it's such an issue that he change who he is, then how can that relationship last for years down the road?

Nobody is perfect. They who look for perfection will be alone forever.

I've said it before. Successful relationships are all about expectations. As long as expectations are consistent, the relationship will work.

Some men need help from a women to be better men. I would be up to my armpits in Warhammer 40K figures, empty beers bottles, spare PC parts and my own filth, doing temp work, if it my wife hadn't supported me through grad school. A women can help change a man, but the change has to be something that the man wants too.

Before we got married, my wife and I had wedding counseling. In those sessions, we discussed where we saw ourselves in ten years time as far as living conditions, family size, money and other stuff. I have to say, our expectations were amazingly consistent with what has transpired. I do make about twice as much money as I thought... but that was because I really had no idea how much a family really costs.

But, we both agree that this is the life we signed on for.

[bsg]

I'm pretty sure that the original email was a lot less serious than the guys made it. If it is, the two probably shouldn't get married.

Although, she's pretty smoking. It might be worth it. ;-)

[masherscf]

Although, she's pretty smoking. It might be worth it. ;-)

Dude, when she's 50, she won't be quite as smoking and she'll be twice as *****y.

[agamotto]

Kevin/Alex... as a 37 year-old who has been around the block more than a few times I can give you three truths for any romantic relationship -

1. No one who loves you wants you to change major components of your life. You do not have any parts that can be swapped out without changing who you are. Anyone who thinks other is in love with themselves, not you.

2. Shacking up needs to be treated as a business arrangement. Those who don't, and have no contract/agreement on paper of said usually wind up broke, or on telly arguing in front of the nation about their dirty laundry.

3. When you think 'we' instead of 'me,' you are ready for living together.

[taswizard]

1. No one who loves you wants you to change major components of your life. You do not have any parts that can be swapped out without changing who you are. Anyone who thinks other is in love with themselves, not you.

I don't think she expressly said that she wanted him to change, she just ignored the guy when he was "geeky." Still agree though, ignoring him is just as bad. Good luck to him though, hopefully everything works out all right.

[ryudo]

Is it really fair to discuss and judge one person based one one e mail from one point of view and that point of view may have been half joking but didn't come off that way?

[kevincollateral]

Is it really fair to discuss and judge one person based one one e mail from one point of view and that point of view may have been half joking but didn't come off that way?


duhhhhhhh....thats what the interweb is for!

[ryudo]

duhhhhhhh....thats what the interweb is for!

No no!
Interweb is for youtube/idiots/myspace


Internetz is for fake news and lol cats.


Internets is for tubes and gossip and flames and discussing peoples future we should not give two shits about.


World Wide Web/Cyberspace is for old people/Media


Internet is for things that really matter and porn.

Online is for games and IM's Skype

[kevincollateral]

Internet is for things that really matter and porn.


isnt that the same thing? lol

[skyz]

maybe she could learn why the internet is so fascinating

maybe she just sees it as competition for 'we' time

maybe she just does not understand she is ignorant

how anyone could not get into some aspect of technology is so not this century

she should change herself rather than change him

geek is a definite plus to anyone at all aware

it is not like tech is a passing trend

:rolleyes:

[taswizard]

maybe she could learn why the internet is so fascinating

maybe she just sees it as competition for 'we' time

maybe she just does not understand she is ignorant

how anyone could not get into some aspect of technology is so not this century

she should change herself rather than change him

geek is a definite plus to anyone at all aware

it is not like tech is a passing trend

:rolleyes:

Yeah, but asking her to change is just as bad as asking him to change. Just because they don't like the same things doesn't mean it can't work out. Acceptance of each other is what really counts, not necessarily fitting with what is 'in' or 'normal.'

[palmeiro]

Please direct all of your comments to this thread:
http://revision3.com/forum/showthread.php?p=260302