Gymnastics Disasters
Monday, April 7th, 2008 – running time 02:02
If these videos are any indication, the America gymnastics team is woefully prepared for the Beijing Summer Games...
I've been doing my research, and from what I can gather the United States Gymnastics team is woefully unprepared to take on the rest of the world this summer over there in Red China.
I mean, look at this urine soaked display of athleticism and listen deafening silence of disappointment from the amassed onlookers:
Video: Gymnastics tumbling disaster
That's not even going to win us a shit brown medal, let alone the gold.
And then there's this hard-charger, who not only won't bring home a medal, but may well spend the rest of her life in traction
Video: Gymnastics balance beam accident
Get up, you sissy! What would Kerry Strug say?
With these kinds of performances, we're in danger of replicating the sorrowful performance of 1988 in Seoul. Remember this?
Video: Gymnastics vaulting pain
Take it from me, as someone who has never excelled at anything in my life, that our gymnasts better start practicing a little harder, or they run the risk of not only shaming this great nation, but also ending up a sad, bitt er, awful failure like me.
Do you have a nomination for an Internet Superstar? Send it to martin at revision3 dot com. And be sure watch the full-length version of this show, a new one premieres every Wednesday, right here on Revision3.
Highlights
United States
(
0:46, 0:46
)
superstar
(
0:06, 0:17, 1:44, 0:06, 0:17, 1:44
)
twit
(
0:11, 0:11
)
Beijing
(
0:18, 0:18
)
United States
(
0:46, 0:46
)
superstar
(
0:06, 0:17, 1:44, 0:06, 0:17, 1:44
)
twit
(
0:11, 0:11
)
Beijing
(
0:18, 0:18
)
Automatically Generated Transcript(may not be 100% accurate) ( more )
" Bush again welcome -- little Internet superstar the poorly executed stubborn -- version of my triple back flip of the old twit itself wondering what can bitch totally stock. -- Revision -- talk show Internet superstar. The Beijing summer games are almost upon us and all anyone can talk about is how the Chinese Government is a practicing the good people of Tibet. Is that what we as Americans should really be concerned about if you have to be. Yeah what we should be focusing on is what really matters namely. Not making complete asses of ourselves on the -- uneven bars and -- voices. Well I've been doing my research. From what I can gather the United States gymnastics team is woefully prepared to take out the rest of the world this summer over there Rajai. I mean look at -- and so that's what about what is visit and silent the disappointment. You -- maps onlookers. That's not even gonna win -- the -- and that outlet along the gulf and then and then there's hard charger who not only won't bring home a metal may well spend the rest of her life in traction. UCC. -- drugs today. With these guys the performances were in danger of replicating this horrible performance of 1988. Console. As someone who has never excelled. Anything in my life that our agendas better start practicing a little harder than run the risk of not only -- this great nation. But also ending up let's add. Bitter awful valley here. Like me. -- do you have a nomination Internet superstar what you go ahead send it to market revision3.com. And -- sure to watch the full length version -- show a -- world premieres every Wednesday right here on Revision 3 thanks so much for watching we'll see tomorrow."
" Bush again welcome -- little Internet superstar the poorly executed stubborn -- version of my triple back flip of the old twit itself wondering what can bitch totally stock. -- Revision -- talk show Internet superstar. The Beijing summer games are almost upon us and all anyone can talk about is how the Chinese Government is a practicing the good people of Tibet. Is that what we as Americans should really be concerned about if you have to be. Yeah what we should be focusing on is what really matters namely. Not making complete asses of ourselves on the -- uneven bars and -- voices. Well I've been doing my research. From what I can gather the United States gymnastics team is woefully prepared to take out the rest of the world this summer over there Rajai. I mean look at -- and so that's what about what is visit and silent the disappointment. You -- maps onlookers. That's not even gonna win -- the -- and that outlet along the gulf and then and then there's hard charger who not only won't bring home a metal may well spend the rest of her life in traction. UCC. -- drugs today. With these guys the performances were in danger of replicating this horrible performance of 1988. Console. As someone who has never excelled. Anything in my life that our agendas better start practicing a little harder than run the risk of not only -- this great nation. But also ending up let's add. Bitter awful valley here. Like me. -- do you have a nomination Internet superstar what you go ahead send it to market revision3.com. And -- sure to watch the full length version -- show a -- world premieres every Wednesday right here on Revision 3 thanks so much for watching we'll see tomorrow."
