Booze, Rappers, Football and Gay Bars
Sunday, September 6th, 2009 running time 12:57
The funniest stand-up comics from across the country take on gay bars, alcohol, Taco Bell, and baseball.
Segments
Seven nights a week, RooftopComedy.com records live stand-up comedy all around the world and brings you the best of it. These are our favorite jokes about gay bars, alcohol, Taco Bell, baseball, and a bunch of other hilarious, disgusting, true stuff. I'm sure you have some hilarious jokes about that stuff too, but trust me, this is better. For more jokes that are better than yours, head over to RooftopComedy.com.
Comedians Brooks Robinson, Matt Braunger, Erin Jackson, Caitlin Gill, Paul Lakamp, Will Hatcher, Isaac Witty, Michael Palascak, Andy Woodhull, Mike Macrae
Highlights
michael j fox
(
11:37
)
jason bay
(
11:33
)
netflix
(
9:35
)
godaddy
(
5:03
)
Automatically Generated Transcript(may not be 100% accurate) ( more )
" That is slowly came from his lips -- to these two colonels came up to me like -- this -- some -- There's lecture. I was gonna take them back saying things that kind of thing actually happened -- what he needed AC Slater blossom or something and though. So they I certainly is cash balance. Excuse the -- And well do an elegant on regulate pollution and the middle of committing a crime right now you know. My palm civilians when -- started on on them like. I have to -- these girls money and have no idea what's going on."
" I thought this kind of tired of the lies and topical commercials you know who's -- forever when sober after 3 am -- their fourth meal. -- You'll wait yeah we do portfolio cut five they'll flock. They're using consonants and talking normally. That act should sound like this primaries."
" Julia Taco Bell walk you -- these -- up your wraps yeah want to uncle Mel -- among them. I would look don't know right now dude it's. That's now that -- ago. I would -- Taco Bell right now. -- And they're both being that -- time. --"
" Last played her brother with me on FaceBook."
" Through any relationship status updates. You know what that means. Not put -- mind. -- think and you see ladies. My cat he says -- only made for dinner and Christina which she's played with stop and Clinton. Is now single. Like until -- companies don't you want to leave your profile -- you're not only is it with someone else's. This isn't about a message simple people have to confirm that they are in fact. In their relationship. But there's no cooperation required for the break up. Somebody you know electronically W you have nobody -- The worst part about it is that they throw up now says single you're still interlaced if you're mainly just -- Use it by yourself what is your metaphor for life -- didn't. I'm here really go that irresponsible on -- the bat like that make sure that you're comfortable getting into it but when he does."
" Xeon line like she if he's not telling -- we're not."
" Before Phillips talked about the war."
" I like that that's good I'm single optimize solution is pornography anybody else. Wow well good room I always get a -- usually it's one lonely and the corner there were granted as soon as he says it out loud. This is a whole roomful. And right now my food you're learning made it I want to be."
" No often solution at my solution is pornography but I realize something very important. Every one. In my research. And that is that there are some things that I Caitlin guilt. -- harder to do. And they are to watch. Let's all just take for example the enthusiastic. Blow job."
" Don't worry -- as I say comes up and all about it I just had no idea. How horrible that looks from the point of view camera angle. Yeah and -- It appears there's not. Little -- he didn't own. And help her. Thanks."
" Everybody yeah. Yeah. Well it's true. I often can't web hosting with -- long term cat godaddy hosting plans that they aren't yeah. Hammer and -- With any. Retooling parts of -- support in no way you look me. Be sure to check out I didn't read that can't let GoDaddy -- counts with other Rockwell go to any deal -- Did you do you T."
" You -- Yeah everybody."
" Good plays sports at all I'll put it that sucker is born I've played you know. Like baseball and -- it sucked at baseball that every time I looked at -- so it would get easier out. Let's not very nice thing is -- at ten year old. Special because your mom."
" I hate -- not. All -- glad to get really bad rap album flopped. -- think I have is that all of his life one that I always like the ones that are bragging on time. I don't like that that make me feel bad as a person knows what is it like. It be known magazines and movies. Only because I got -- man is an active I guess Mike gets out. I I presume deliberately being did you -- they -- that. Asian guerrilla New Jersey me up obviously versus -- point two Bob hey I'll pay. Money -- it. Following day. The make me feel bad that I met. They -- making life decisions. Within that on a bus though. Maria. I don't like about by the brave. Maybe at this hour with no real advantage. But about so. I might -- Hunger. They -- go we've. So through these when they finally us no good. Parents feel awkward the awkward air board's president guy every never doubted her part. Like now we have -- that announcement is as the world's most are now all keep our eyes peeled for suspicious. Behavior. Not really does I hear that all really does is makes me very aware. That everyone around me just heard that same man -- Slavishly. Like weird like -- gave. I'm not even doing anything and so this client. --"
" Nothing more since president. -- someone who is. Trying do not axis threat exists."
" Beloved dog guard eyes while number twelve what did you myself and horses that its its behavior. Can I don't walk out as BI look. Didn't. Probably not win them. Yeah but earlier. I unzip my back. Manages it data arrived back out. -- At those -- know it's like hey what's going on over here. Missing. -- Keep your eye on this fun."
" Hi my name is Dave Thompson and I love movies. I used to watch omen movie streaming online for free that -- until I got a virus that flip my screen upside down turn everything in a Chinese. Values Netflix. -- Netflix you can read over a 100000 titles online including lots of Blu-ray movies with free shipping both ways to your home. They now have over forty shipping centers almost all deliveries happen in just one business day. The Netflix plans start from 499. As a new member you get a no risk two week free trial membership. Check it out at www. netflix.com slash brothel."
" I played sports and other times the life I -- labeled wanna risk but you're very get -- I senator quarterback as a sophomore. And we lost we lost all against. We also in 84 to nothing GAAP. -- after that every game we didn't lose by 84 it was a victory. Let's let's mornings ago. Eighty boarded nothing commonly what did you learn a -- seven times twelve equals 84. Any other questions just press conference over."
" I mean sick and don't let. My friends balancing out -- enlightened government. There are skeptical of me for no reason at all here's a story -- law -- my car a couple of weeks ago. Happen and it's all this started three different bodies each of them got up hey man -- coyote. You know -- the walkman -- evening. Just beyond board for the story."
" It says there's something. You horrors flew down in front of me on -- work. At the last."
" It would -- McConnell routers. Unharmed and I can name is Allison team ala -- Even if I get my friend does that suggest they're proud to adapt -- Jason Bay and you know. Have they have Michael J. Fox T want that's share."
" These live in Houston Texas. Very big and it gave me down -- lot of gay bars less straight people go to the game Bartlett know that -- there. And onetime -- we're going forward and do flip flop or whatever them. West and I was gonna -- early about -- tolerated gay people have what they are. He hasn't heard this term gain are what they call reliability to tell who's gay and -- nowadays they radar it's gays somehow I guess. Apparently there's no not -- leaving home right -- no. Apparently a lot of -- producers still equipment like old Soviet Cold War era -- They got off the usual -- even the black market and eighties or something like that it is definitely work too well anymore. Because on another night in a sailor suit grinds gotta go. But the upgrades and it -- our download when they come out. --"
" That is slowly came from his lips -- to these two colonels came up to me like -- this -- some -- There's lecture. I was gonna take them back saying things that kind of thing actually happened -- what he needed AC Slater blossom or something and though. So they I certainly is cash balance. Excuse the -- And well do an elegant on regulate pollution and the middle of committing a crime right now you know. My palm civilians when -- started on on them like. I have to -- these girls money and have no idea what's going on."
" I thought this kind of tired of the lies and topical commercials you know who's -- forever when sober after 3 am -- their fourth meal. -- You'll wait yeah we do portfolio cut five they'll flock. They're using consonants and talking normally. That act should sound like this primaries."
" Julia Taco Bell walk you -- these -- up your wraps yeah want to uncle Mel -- among them. I would look don't know right now dude it's. That's now that -- ago. I would -- Taco Bell right now. -- And they're both being that -- time. --"
" Last played her brother with me on FaceBook."
" Through any relationship status updates. You know what that means. Not put -- mind. -- think and you see ladies. My cat he says -- only made for dinner and Christina which she's played with stop and Clinton. Is now single. Like until -- companies don't you want to leave your profile -- you're not only is it with someone else's. This isn't about a message simple people have to confirm that they are in fact. In their relationship. But there's no cooperation required for the break up. Somebody you know electronically W you have nobody -- The worst part about it is that they throw up now says single you're still interlaced if you're mainly just -- Use it by yourself what is your metaphor for life -- didn't. I'm here really go that irresponsible on -- the bat like that make sure that you're comfortable getting into it but when he does."
" Xeon line like she if he's not telling -- we're not."
" Before Phillips talked about the war."
" I like that that's good I'm single optimize solution is pornography anybody else. Wow well good room I always get a -- usually it's one lonely and the corner there were granted as soon as he says it out loud. This is a whole roomful. And right now my food you're learning made it I want to be."
" No often solution at my solution is pornography but I realize something very important. Every one. In my research. And that is that there are some things that I Caitlin guilt. -- harder to do. And they are to watch. Let's all just take for example the enthusiastic. Blow job."
" Don't worry -- as I say comes up and all about it I just had no idea. How horrible that looks from the point of view camera angle. Yeah and -- It appears there's not. Little -- he didn't own. And help her. Thanks."
" Everybody yeah. Yeah. Well it's true. I often can't web hosting with -- long term cat godaddy hosting plans that they aren't yeah. Hammer and -- With any. Retooling parts of -- support in no way you look me. Be sure to check out I didn't read that can't let GoDaddy -- counts with other Rockwell go to any deal -- Did you do you T."
" You -- Yeah everybody."
" Good plays sports at all I'll put it that sucker is born I've played you know. Like baseball and -- it sucked at baseball that every time I looked at -- so it would get easier out. Let's not very nice thing is -- at ten year old. Special because your mom."
" I hate -- not. All -- glad to get really bad rap album flopped. -- think I have is that all of his life one that I always like the ones that are bragging on time. I don't like that that make me feel bad as a person knows what is it like. It be known magazines and movies. Only because I got -- man is an active I guess Mike gets out. I I presume deliberately being did you -- they -- that. Asian guerrilla New Jersey me up obviously versus -- point two Bob hey I'll pay. Money -- it. Following day. The make me feel bad that I met. They -- making life decisions. Within that on a bus though. Maria. I don't like about by the brave. Maybe at this hour with no real advantage. But about so. I might -- Hunger. They -- go we've. So through these when they finally us no good. Parents feel awkward the awkward air board's president guy every never doubted her part. Like now we have -- that announcement is as the world's most are now all keep our eyes peeled for suspicious. Behavior. Not really does I hear that all really does is makes me very aware. That everyone around me just heard that same man -- Slavishly. Like weird like -- gave. I'm not even doing anything and so this client. --"
" Nothing more since president. -- someone who is. Trying do not axis threat exists."
" Beloved dog guard eyes while number twelve what did you myself and horses that its its behavior. Can I don't walk out as BI look. Didn't. Probably not win them. Yeah but earlier. I unzip my back. Manages it data arrived back out. -- At those -- know it's like hey what's going on over here. Missing. -- Keep your eye on this fun."
" Hi my name is Dave Thompson and I love movies. I used to watch omen movie streaming online for free that -- until I got a virus that flip my screen upside down turn everything in a Chinese. Values Netflix. -- Netflix you can read over a 100000 titles online including lots of Blu-ray movies with free shipping both ways to your home. They now have over forty shipping centers almost all deliveries happen in just one business day. The Netflix plans start from 499. As a new member you get a no risk two week free trial membership. Check it out at www. netflix.com slash brothel."
" I played sports and other times the life I -- labeled wanna risk but you're very get -- I senator quarterback as a sophomore. And we lost we lost all against. We also in 84 to nothing GAAP. -- after that every game we didn't lose by 84 it was a victory. Let's let's mornings ago. Eighty boarded nothing commonly what did you learn a -- seven times twelve equals 84. Any other questions just press conference over."
" I mean sick and don't let. My friends balancing out -- enlightened government. There are skeptical of me for no reason at all here's a story -- law -- my car a couple of weeks ago. Happen and it's all this started three different bodies each of them got up hey man -- coyote. You know -- the walkman -- evening. Just beyond board for the story."
" It says there's something. You horrors flew down in front of me on -- work. At the last."
" It would -- McConnell routers. Unharmed and I can name is Allison team ala -- Even if I get my friend does that suggest they're proud to adapt -- Jason Bay and you know. Have they have Michael J. Fox T want that's share."
" These live in Houston Texas. Very big and it gave me down -- lot of gay bars less straight people go to the game Bartlett know that -- there. And onetime -- we're going forward and do flip flop or whatever them. West and I was gonna -- early about -- tolerated gay people have what they are. He hasn't heard this term gain are what they call reliability to tell who's gay and -- nowadays they radar it's gays somehow I guess. Apparently there's no not -- leaving home right -- no. Apparently a lot of -- producers still equipment like old Soviet Cold War era -- They got off the usual -- even the black market and eighties or something like that it is definitely work too well anymore. Because on another night in a sailor suit grinds gotta go. But the upgrades and it -- our download when they come out. --"
jackierulesall
Started discussion: September 8, 2009 @ 9:58am GMT
Episode 18 - Booze, Rappers, Football and Gay Bars [Discussion]
The funniest stand-up comics from across the country take on gay bars, alcohol, Taco Bell, and baseball.
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