I had long heard tales about the vortexes that riddle the gorgeous landscape and how they might purify and enhance the soul if treated respectfully. Vortexes are areas of spiraling spiritual energy existing across many dimensions that facilitate prayer, meditation and healing. But it is not something that I can explain to you. It is something that you must experience for yourself.

Hoping to heal what ails me, I set out to Sedona to meet my guides, Harold Vaughn and Mark Griffon of Sedona Mystical Tours. Though there are some fifty different tour companies in Sedona that will take you to the vortexes, something within me told me to go with these guys, and I'm glad I did. Clearly, some higher force had led me to them. They are the real deal, and if you ever head to Sedona for your own self-discovery experience, I highly recommend their services.

Harold and Mark are the types of guys whom, when you're in their presence, radiate wisdom and deep understanding. They are true spirit guides, not just tour operators looking for profit. And that's why I feel so badly that the burning sage they enveloped me in as we stood atop the red rock plateau of the Cathedral vortex caused me to sneeze violently, scattering the sacred ashes all over the red sandstone like so much bong refuse. I cringe to admit it, but I think what I did is roughly equivalent to pissing in the holy water at Notre Dame Cathedral.

I hope I didn't infuriate the gods and make myself worse off than before I set out on my journey, but that's for you to determine for yourself as you watch this episode of Web Drifter.